[Flashback]Clarity Which Clouds My Mind [Jeremiah]

[Jonathan Crane - Scarecrow]

Dr. Crane sighed heavily in the coffee line. There were far too many people around him. He wasn’t afraid of people, nor did he have short patience for them. It was quite the opposite of that actually. He wouldn’t be good at what he did if he did have a short fuse. His problem was people’s inability to understand him or see what they should see. It would have been nice for someone to actually see him. But for now he would have to make do with being ordered to have coffee with his boss.

The doctor was never a very social person. Even when he was teaching he was talking at his students not with his students. It wasn’t as if they could have ever passed his class to begin with and the few that did just barely scraped by with any grace at all. He couldn’t bring himself to pass someone that didn’t understand the concept he was trying to teach. By the time the incident happened, he was probably on his way for being fired from so many failed students as it was. They would blame him instead of their inability to learn.

When he got up to the front he ordered his bosses coffee and his own. He got two packets of sugar for him and took his own black as he always did. There was really no point in doctoring up something you wouldn’t drink much of anyway. He didn’t want to get a stomach ache with whatever Dr. Arkham wanted to meet him for coffee for. Whatever it was, it seemed like a friendly interaction. He hadn’t been doing bad at his new job, in fact he knew he had been doing phenomenal.

Dr. Crane walked outside with both of their coffees and sat under the umbrella with him. Dr. Arkham was already there, sitting and looking at something on his phone. It was then that Dr. Crane had realized that he’d under dressed for the event, being far more casual and tattered than usual. He had been busy working on something at home and it was, beginning to frustrate him. Maybe that’s what Dr. Arkham wanted to talk to him about? Well, he didn’t need to ‘worry’ there was nothing that he needed to know about it.

“ I can’t imagine why you would want to spend such a beautiful day here speaking with a coworker….I’m sure you have a plethora of better things to do in your schedule than take the time to have coffee with myself. Regardless I am thankful for the opportunity to come." He slid his coffee to him and spoke casually. He brought his own coffee to his lips and waited for Dr. Arkham to join him from his phone.

[Jeremiah Arkham - Black Mask]

He’d offered to join Dr. Crane in the coffee line. In fact he’d stood up to do just that, but Jonathan had insisted and so Jeremiah had sat down outside the café where there were less people, just as he knew Jonathan liked. He wasn’t blind to the man’s awkward social tendencies. He knew he didn’t like large crowds, but he was successful at his job. So Jeremiah wasn’t exactly sure what bothered him so much about the world around him, but he intended to find out. That wasn’t the reason behind this coffee outing, however, and it had been an invitation. There had been no force involved. He respected Jonathan too much to even attempt some form of coercion. He’d simply invited him if he had the time.

He’d have taken offense to Jonathan’s feeling forced. He’d offer to leave the man to his tasks then. Apologize for the offer that Jonathan could have refused.

Jeremiah wasn’t offended or turned off by the stiff mannerism Jonathan held himself with, or that often he spoke at people instead of to them. This was the reason he had failed as a professor, not as the board said because of his radical teaching methods. Jeremiah had been impressed with that, though of course they were held to ethical standards. All this amounted to for Jeremiah was that Jonathan had never been meant to teach. He was too creative and private for that. He saw the world with a different pair of lenses that made his students fail to comprehend and he was so set in ways he would not change. He was meant to research, experiment, hypothesize. He was made to treat people and discover new radical aspects of the human mind. So Jeremiah had hired him.

His phone vibrated against the table. Jeremiah glanced up to assess Jonathan’s progress in the long line before he looked down to the message. He’d been talking casually to one of his medical doctors in the medical wing of the Asylum. Melina Graves, he recalled her name with a smile as he quickly typed a message to her. She was currently at work, most likely now on break. He was setting up dinner for the night. Nathaniel was spending the night at a friend’s house so he was absolutely free to take the woman to dinner. Just as he was free to have coffee with his employee and discuss where his work was taking him in Arkham Asylum.

Jonathan had been exceptional at his job, but Jeremiah had noticed he too seemed stifled. He needed space to grow, to reach his potential. Jeremiah wanted to see him grow. He was interested in all the ideas and theories Jonathan had stated in his lectures. He understood them far more than those students. He heard him sit down and glanced up at him. Jeremiah was dressed casually, but he’d just gotten off from work. As for Jonathan’s attire he didn’t notice or completely overlooked it. The offer had been sudden, after all.

“What better thing could I fill my schedule with,” he asked as he silenced his phone and placed it in his pocket, “than speaking to a co-worker about a job opportunity?” He took his cup of coffee and without looking, poured the sugar into it and stirred. His gaze was on Jonathan. “You’ve been doing better than expected acclimatizing to your new job, but I don’t think your heart’s really in staying in the Mansion for an office. You’re itching to do something else. I have an empty building on the island that I have debating the use for.” He gave him a smile. “Would you like it?”

[Jonathan Crane - Scarecrow]

Dr. Crane thought there were many things he could have been filling his schedule with. Just he alone had far too much to do to have time for an outing like this, but the frustration of his work was leading him to want an escape, even if it was a short one. He knew that every now and then he needed to take a break as he had been taught and had taught himself. Did he really believe it? That was another story. But as for Dr. Arkham he expected the man would be far too busy to speak to him about anything unless it was discipline. The man was always busy, as busy as a doctor was expected to be.

The words “Job Opportunity” had caught his ears. He set his coffee down that he had barely taken a sip of to begin with to listen carefully to his next words. He felt the heat come away from his fingers and be replaced with the cool air around them, but he never noticed he’d let go of his coffee. He was…being Promoted? The doctor stammered around in his head trying to think of something to say. What were you supposed to say when promoted? It wasn’t as if he didn’t deserve to be promoted he knew he was better than anyone there but to be given an entire wing? An Entire Wing!?

Something was caught in his throat. If it were visible it would have doubled the size of his adam’s apple and as many times as he opened his mouth the right words wouldn’t come out. He was clearly still processing exactly what he’d been told, but it was deeper than that. Finding the right words to these kind of situations was not as hard as actually saying them. So with a bitter taste in his mouth he finally managed it. “Thank you….doesn’t…seem adequate.” he slipped out of saying with without an attachment. He figured it would still be sufficient but it felt so awkward. He had no idea how to accept a “gift” this large, even if he did deserve every inch of that wing.

The sheer size of the wing was still buzzing through his mind and his fingers had actually began to tap on the table softly. At his home he was already conducting side projects of his own, but he didn’t have the right space or all the right tools. His home was just not a good place to practice in or at least it wasn’t the environment that he deserved to work in. If it were up to him he’d be a fully funded independent researcher and he’d take private patience of his one. But unfortunately the state had regulations against that to keep out all the malpractice that could come of it. It was an understandable measure, but it was still something that prevented him from going deeper into his research.

Dr. Arkham, he could only assume had seen this and had wanted to give him that space that he needed. At his work place he would have the space provided, all the patients at his disposal and all the tools he could ever hope to use. Not just that, but he could work in private away from the jealous prying weyes of other doctors. They avoided him as much as he avoided them. He was talk to them if spoken to, but none of them ever did. But by now he was used to this kind of behavior, it was all psychological. But for Dr. Arkham? He hadn’t expected this.

“I accept..” He finally added after her realized Dr. Arkham was still asking him the question of wanting it or not. He did want it, very much so. He opened his palm finally and let the back of his hand touch the table. Dr. Crane rolled his lips as him if he trying to find the best way to explain something unexplainable.”There are things that I have been working on that this would be beneficial too. I believe with this addition to the work I have been doing I will be able to complete it…” He swallowed, trying not to actually give away anything about it aside from the fact that he was doing it. Dr. Crane was a private man in more than one way. “ There are some conditions…Of course.. I would like the wing to be private and have access to only those who have business specifically in that wing.” He asked, hoping it wasn’t too much to ask for. Other doctors could still come into the wing of course, but they had to have a purpose behind it.

[Jeremiah Arkham - Black Mask]

Jeremiah could have been occupying himself with the stack of paperwork he was aware was on his desk, suggestions from the staff, new medical journals, newsletters about what changes could be made. Any and everything that one could expect a business owner to receive and more papers on the subject mental health. It seemed the paperwork never ended, not that all had been done with a day, but there was always more and more and sure, Jeremiah could be worrying about it. He could also be obsessing about the therapy session that would taking place after lunch. He could worry about Nathaniel at school, but he too had taught himself to take breaks and unlike Jonathan he truly believed in them. Besides he’d have much rather been here anyway to ask Jonathan personally about a promotion—he’s really not one for the detached voice of letters.

He’d have missed his reaction had he inquired about it in writing too. It wasn’t in malicious amusement, but he watched with a smile as Jonathan let go of his coffee, watched his brain turning it’s gears as he tried to respond. He’d shocked him and while Jeremiah knew his newest employee would be taken by surprise he’d not expected such a reaction. The Dr. Crane he’d knew usually was calm and collected. It was nice to see that even he could be taken unawares. It was nice to see plain emotion. Yet despite finding himself more comfortable and over all amused, he waited patiently and hide his smiles behind sips of coffee as he watched the man struggle to find an appropriate response.

He’d have reacted in the way same. In fact he had when he’d been told he’d been sold his uncle’s old institution to rebuild and renew.

Jeremiah placed his coffee down and nodded, “Thank you is all I wanted, well,” he laughed softly, “what I mean is, I assume that means you accept it, yes? I couldn’t think of anyone better.”

He was still asking the question of whether not Jonathan did in fact accept the offer, but he already knew it would be. He could see it in the way he tapped his fingers on the table. Dr. Arkham had seen and known that Jonathan was working on his own theories and experiments and he wanted Arkham Asylum to be a part of it. He didn’t want the recognition for himself, but for his workplace. He wanted to encourage and build Jonathan up, offer him what he needed. He saw a man that had so much potential and home wasn’t where he’d be able to have access to all he needed.

Jeremiah Arkham respected Jonathan, and more than that he was all too interested in learning still as well. He wanted to know and be able to see into the human mind more and more. So how could be not offer this? Jeremiah had never made an effort to avoid Jonathan. He spoke to him whenever he saw him even if it was the record of “Good mornings” and pleasantries. He never passed him without saying something.

“You accept? Excellent, now it’s my turn to say thank you. I figured you would use it for something actually usual.” He sat up with a large grin. Yes, he was happy Jonathan wanted the wing. He had wanted Jonathan to want it instead of having to watch the jackals that were some of his other doctors fight for the place. He nodded, “I suspected as much. You’re always seemingly preoccupied with something.” He folded his hands and didn’t pry. Did he want to, yes? But he understood that Jonathan was a private person and he’d find out in due time. He always did. So he stayed quiet and he listened to Jonathan’s first terms and then nodded. “You and I will be the only ones with keys. You’ll have yours and I’ll keep mine in my office that way if anyone wishes to come to your wing they will have to come through my office and thus, me.”

[Jonathan Crane - Scarecrow]

His mind had wandered from the conversation as Dr. Arkham began to speak again. His eyes seemed to have some attention, focused on his eyes but not fully there. It was if he had begun to look through him and move somewhere that wasn’t in this current place and time. The opportunity that he had been given was an endless opportunity to expand upon what he needed to. With this kind of equipment, space and solitude he could change the world. But it wouldn’t want to change, he would just have to expose it for what he knew it would be….He just had to find it and he thought he had the means to prove it.

Finally his eyes came back to life after he mentioned he was usually occupied. It was true, often he would stay clear of groups at work, or rather they would avoid him. It was something he paid no mind to anymore. Over the years he had simply become used to people avoiding him and he wasn’t one for idly conversation to begin with. People were just ignorant vessels moving around toward a purpose they thought was their own. But it couldn’t be that….he had found that it was never that for himself and there was only one thing that had driven his every action. But how could he prove it?

His fingers laced together next to his coffee which had begun to get cold. He never had any real intention of drinking it anyway, but Dr. Arkham probably noticed that from work as well. It seemed the doctor had noticed a lot about his work. It seemed like all the times he’d been singled out of the group for his work wasn’t for nothing, or to pick and prod at his observations. He had noticed something deeper within, that he was superior to everyone there. He smiled at the mention of having his own keys, he’d rather that Dr. Arkham didn’t have another set but he would have to have access. At least he would be informed if he was coming.

He found it interesting that he wanted to be the divide in between the wings, as if he was trying to keep something contained, but the thought slipped from him quickly. The wing would just give him more room to work and an environment that he could control without the prying eyes of less talented doctors. Dr. Arkham wanted him to perform and he intended to give him what he desired and more. But there was something even more important than all of that on his mind.

Dr. Crane wasn’t entire comfortable when he went on to thank him. He never cared for being told thank you or giving it, a formality if anything. He shrugged it off with a nod and tried to get him to drop the praise immediately. It was obvious that he deserved everything that he was being given here, it was the fact that he was given it that was unexpected.

He coughed before he finally spoke again, he seemed a bit disheveled in his thoughts, as if they were almost too scattered to put into words. “This…may seem sudden, but with the grant of this wing I must request a short vacation.” He asked without actually asking a question. He figured after giving him something so large a vacation wouldn’t be out of the question, though an odd request. He had never asked for time off before. In fact it seemed as if he lived at work. His home was boring to him, it mimicked his work place except without anything to work on. All he did was flip through case files and work more. If he was allowed it he would have always been clocked in.

But this vacation was needed if he was going to have this new space. There was a place that he needed to go, something he had heard from a whisper. If it was true he needed to see it himself and he needed to find out exactly what it could do. It may just be the thing that changes everything. He wasn’t one to go off on a dead lead to anywhere, but all of his research on it had lead him to nothing but dead ends. It was so rare it was nearly unheard of, but it had to be there. He knew that something had to be there and he would take the risk.

[Jeremiah Arkham - Black Mask]

Being offered what he had been, Jeremiah was neither offended nor curious as to why Jonathan peered at him so oddly. He could imagine the ideas and excitement going through Jonathan’s head and he knew that feeling. It was the same he’d had when discovered that he’d won his ownership of Arkham Asylum those years ago. The possibilities were endless and he knew he’d rebuild it better than before. Sure the journey was nowhere near complete, but greatness lie with every step. He’d always believed that within his asylum, any and all things were possible. Jonathan would be adding to that legacy and his own. Jeremiah wanted him to find the greatness he sought whatever it was for he could see the hunger in his eyes like a starved wolf.

Jonathan was a starved and lone wolf, but in their field did they not all start out so jaded and alone? Jeremiah himself was still paranoid about people getting into his business. He was social out of need and really, he didn’t mind talking. He usually had much to speak about. He loved to theorize but there was no stipulation that Jonathan had to be the same and so Jeremiah had never minded his solitary nature. He just hoped he could grow from it to be able to show the world whatever it was he believed of the mind. Jeremiah just knew it would be astounding. Even in the most skewed of theories there was always something to grab onto and build anew.

A new wing was a bold, large thing to give to someone so new to his employee. He already knew it would incense the other doctors, but so be it. Jonathan had shown fresh promise, not the dusty old textbook nonsense of his years at university. The fact was, psychology was changing every day and a new psychopathy reared its head seemingly every day in Gotham since the arrival of the Batman. Arkham Asylum needed new ideas and fresh eyes for many things. His senior employees were stable and helpful, but he had to look to the future. And no matter what the sacrifice, he was betting on Jonathan Crane. And he knew there would be sacrifice. Why else would have given him a large wing to operate within?

Jeremiah had finished the last dregs of his own coffee when Jonathan spoke again. Of course he’d noticed the other had hardly touched it, but he didn’t mind. If he was focused more on the conversation then Jeremiah had judged him right. He knew exactly what was important. He was indeed the asset Arkham needed. Both the man and the asylum and he had no plans to interfere beyond what he had to do. Minds needed to be uninhibited to work the best. Pressure could be applied, but it was Jonathan’s ideas, not his. Jeremiah was excited to see the results. He would not ask to sit in at first, not yet. He was aware of the secretive nature of Jonathan Crane.

“I don’t think it seems sudden at all. I imagine you have a lot to gather and work out. If I had been offered this post, I too would have taken a trip. When I secured Arkham Asylum as my own and brought it back within the control of my family, I did in fact. It’s just something the mind and soul need at these points in life,” he nodded with a small smile. “Take your vacation and get out into the air, I know you hardly leave the asylum.” That was because he worked there much later than his own timecard spoke of as well.

Jeremiah Arkham picked up the paper mug that he’d been drinking from and tossed it across the outdoor café. It flew through the mouth of the trashcan. Jeremiah grinned and turned back to Jonathan. “When should I put you down for your leave?”

[Jonathan Crane - Scarecrow]

Even as his boss began to speak again Dr. Crane became lost in his own thought. He was already setting up everything in his head to leave as soon as possible. He knew exactly where he needed to go and what he was trying to find. Just the opportunity to go was something he needed to leap on now or he would never find the time to do it. This was bigger than him though, this needed to be done and he would sacrifice everything for the chance to see if it was possible.

When he heard the word leave, suddenly he snapped back to attention. “Tomorrow.” He answered quickly and with purpose behind it. It was clear that he had been thinking about this. He knew that the notice was soon but the sooner that he got out there the sooner he could get back and work on things he needed to.

Now that he had the wing to himself, he would be able to do everything that he was limited to before. He could use the labs for his own research and have a team at his disposal if he wished, though he wasn’t sure if he would use them. Dr. Crane was more than willing to work by himself. If the halls of the asylum were empty, all but himself he would be at home. The only people that he would need to keep him company would be his patients and that would be fine.

“Tomorrow and I’ll need only a few days.” he spoke to him but wasn’t looking directly at him. His mind was too lost in that place that he was thinking of. “Just mark me for three days, I should be back by then.” He insisted that the time was short.

Dr. Crane wasn’t fond of vacations. He had always racked up vacation time but lost it by the end of the year. He couldn’t remember the last time he took a day off, but the rest of the staff used it like it was their therapy. Dr. Crane’s therapy was being involved in his work. The people around him were weak and simple minded, he didn’t have time for them. Dr. Arkham on the other hand he could respect to a degree. At least the man had taken time to notice his talents and beyond that put them to good use.

The doctor could assist him with his projects….Possibly. It would depend upon the research he was doing. It would be pointless to let him in on everything he was doing. The doctor finally perked from the place his mind was settled in and caught his eyes again. His hands tapped his coffee, that still sat full. The probably wasn’t going to drink it, but would that come to a shock for Dr. Arkham?

Dr. Crane never took his lunch break either.

[Jeremiah Arkham - Black Mask]

Tomorrow.

Tomorrow? Jeremiah wasn’t bothered by the fact that Jonathan didn’t seem to be staring at him or lost in his own thoughts. Jonathan wanted to leave tomorrow and even though he heard the request that it was only going to be a few days, he found himself dumbstruck. That was just very, very sudden. When he’d given the okay he’d expected to hear that Jonathan wanted to scope out his new wing for a few days to make his plans then ask to be off.

But he wanted that time immediately.

Jeremiah didn’t think of whether he’d be assisting Jonathan or what he’d get to discover of Jonathan’s use of the wing. He took it as a given he’d be able to see some of it, but he also knew that doctors had their secrets and he didn’t like getting in the way of research.

He was brought back by Jonathan’s tapping and he swallowed. “That’s very short notice,” he said and laughed lightly, “but I did ask. A few days off then. I know you’ll use them well.”

He did notice that Jonathan’s cup was still full, but that didn’t seem to garner much of his attention.